I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas despite being locked down again in the UK! If it makes you feel any better I am busy working 7 day weeks right now - saving up to record my album! I'll be working all through out the Christmas and New year period.
As the New Year comes creeping in…. I wanted to get in early and inspire you to reflect up on the big changes & learnings you have made this year.
What a year 2020 has been with the US presidential election, black lives matters campaign, coronavirus, Brexit. So many lives and businesses ruined and now we are left facing the future pondering what will come next? Surely it can’t get any worse than 2020?
In the World of Chloe Clouds - it has been an entire year since I first took the plunge to really chase my heart’s desire and push the music side out of me. Never before had I deeply plunged into songwriting, however writing I’ll Carry Me and having a music professional friend tell me it had potential – that was a massive turning point for me. A true ‘AHA’ moment that encouraged me to delve further. Not only was writing music and pouring soul & emotion into writing a kind of therapy but also I have never enjoyed learning so much. Embarking upon a summer songwriting course – which ended up being 12 weeks of virtual classes. Connecting with some very young and talented musicians.
When studying for a passion it naturally becomes so easy to put the work effort and time in. I had a similar experience when I studied for my WSET 1,2 & 3 courses for wine for my hospitality ‘day job’ – working on yachts. I emerged myself into it and thoroughly enjoyed the study, but more so the tastings of course haha. Always partial to a vineyard visit!
When I reflect on where I was at a year ago - I feel proud of myself. After a break-up, a period of self-sabotage, drinking heavily, a period of self- hate, a time of rebuilding from rejection and boosting my self- esteem and with the support of some very good friends I am in such a good place finally – it really has taken so much time. I feel whole hearted again and have so much to share with you all through my songs.
I’m grateful for all my friends – those who listened to my worries, my concerns, my moanings – Ryan & Natalie – you both especially so – you both reached out during some of the toughest times in the past year. My two best friends who came to visit me during a tough time last summer – Katie and Nikki – I love you both dearly. Sophie – who is one of my closest friends and always there at the end of the phone! Truth is I love you all. I appreciate all of you taking the time to read this and those that have supported me throughout. This would never have been possible without all that hand holding along the way. All that soul searching. All those challenges I faced. Also to Penny Belcher – for pushing me up on stage in Agua Bar many years ago where it really all started – I just never listened to my intuition enough. Now I want singing to be a bigger part of my life. I am fully embracing the writing side. I love the creative side and exploring the writing more and more. I’d actually say I enjoy the writing side more than the performing side! I promise not to side line it again and to make it a focus in my daily life in some way or another, and if I reach the stage where I can actually make a living doing what I love then hurrah! For now I do it for the love, for the joy, the hours spent creating something from scratch. I have a new found appreciation for artists out there who really do spend hours and hours creating. It takes a lot of love, time and patience along with perseverance and rejection - a topic I will cover later in this blog. I will be one of those sickly happy people who has a job they LOVE day in and day out! Not to say I don’t enjoy yachting – I really do, but singing takes me to a whole other level of soul fulfilling happiness. Joining the two is the icing on the cake.
What are your small wins for this last year?
The other day I had somebody purchase my song on my webpage – I can’t tell you how special that felt. It was a huge milestone. Also getting a Spotify profile page. When I have music on Spotify – it really will be a massive personal goal of mine reached. A lot of people think this can be set up overnight - it really does take weeks and months. Hours of edits & recording. I have never been more determined to pursue something in my entire life.
Over 2020 and in 2019 I have had many friends encourage me, only now have I felt confident enough to really pursue it. Getting over the ‘fear’ of putting yourself out there really is the hardest part. You can easily look up the ‘how to’ and rely on trustworthy friends to help where needed. I was fortunate that a connection I made in Ibiza - became a very valuable one and opened up a huge door for me, showed me the way into the music industry. I had an entirely new industry to learn quickly and a mentor pointing me in the right direction helping me make key decisions early on, giving me feedback along the way. He accelerated my progress massively and without him none of this would have been possible. A huge amount has happened to me over this last year. I have learnt so so much. I have taken away so much value from this last year – life lessons mainly. Living through a pandemic as a Globe trotter has been a real eye opener! I have still travelled immensely – France, Monaco, Greece, Italy, Spain, Middle East. A year ago on Christmas day I was flying out to Sydney Australia for my best friend from school’s wedding, then I stopped by Bali on the way back. It was there that I really found inner peace. Then straight back into a lockdown where I used my time as wisely as possible, completing so many courses & making a plan of action for my social media and writing as much as I could. I think I wrote a good 40 songs during lockdown – not all of them finished though! I have recorded two of them to date and will continue to use this material and make edits to bring you fresh music next year.
2020 was a powerful year – spiritually, emotionally & intellectually. Teaching us all to appreciate what we have. That life is short. That coronavirus can affect anybody. That we should protect the vulnerable and respect the emergency medical teams more. To appreciate who we are. To make more meaningful connections rather than a quick swipe to the right. To love ourselves. To look after ourselves and to cherish our family. Nothing lasts forever so enjoy every moment.
Appreciate the small wins most of all. Listen to what really matters to you. Others may guide you but you will always know what is best for you – listen to that. Note down all those small wins to keep you motivated during the tough times. Friends comments always spur me on when I have been close to giving up, fact is that persistence and consistency pay off.
Set your intentions for 2021 and don’t let anything stop you. All those things you have been thinking of doing, those plans of ideas you have wanted to start, those dreams you wanted to follow, do them….start now before it is too late. Don’t regret anything. You will only regret the things you don’t do.
Live it. Learn from it & in the words of Nike – just do it. I have and I encourage you whole heartedly to do the same. Face your fears. Don't hide from them.